For work that still feels unfinished.
My interest lies less in the process or the change itself than in what lies beneath it: in people, in teams and within organisations.
Shadi — The Unfinished
Shadi Pashaie
Systemic facilitator · MfN registered mediator · Organisational advisor
I am fascinated by what people say is going on, but even more by what is happening beneath the surface. Why a conflict keeps returning, why collaboration fails despite good intentions, why a relationship falls into the same pattern or why a team cannot move forward.
I look at behaviour, interests, relationships and the patterns that people and systems sustain together. Sometimes a conflict is a symptom of something larger.
In conflicts and negotiations, I work from my expertise in mediation. When recurring patterns or underlying dynamics call for it, I use systemic work.
That way of looking was shaped by years of experience inside complex organisations. There I saw how brilliant people and ambitious strategies are sometimes held back by something hard to grasp: clashing interests, differing cultures and work ethics, lack of clarity about roles and mandate, or patterns everyone feels but no one names.
Authority and compassion are not opposites.
I do not really believe in “I help you grow” or in coaching language. I help make visible what you may no longer be able to see yourself: when your own perspective has become too dominant, your blind spot around your own behaviour has grown and your judgement is clouded by interests, emotion or habit.
I guide people in looking critically at their own part in a dynamic, a personal conflict, stalled development and deeply rooted beliefs.
In my work I am independent and direct, without becoming hard. I do not work from a fixed method; every situation has its own history and calls for an approach that fits. I do not avoid discomfort and I raise what others prefer to leave untouched. At the same time I keep sight of the person behind the behaviour and of the interests that lie beneath a conflict or a pattern.
I am not the one who invents the solution to a conflict. My role is to look along, make connections visible and offer another perspective. Sometimes by slowing things down, sometimes by bringing sharpness, and sometimes by simply observing longer than most people find comfortable.
I work from trust, with respect for everyone's position and responsibility. I work analytically and intuitively, practically and inquisitively. I am critical where needed, but always approachable and careful in how I engage.
Mediation
Conflict is information. I make visible what remains unsaid and bring the conversation to the underlying interests, creating room for another perspective and a workable solution.
Systemic work
Before mediation is needed, before conflict arises, systemic work can map tensions and dysfunctions so they can be named and neutralised early.
Observing as an outsider
An external observer can offer insight into the dynamics, both in private life and at work. That outside view helps people reflect on their own part, behaviour and position within the tension.
When you learn to look differently, what you see changes too.
Amsterdam based, working in English & Dutch
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